:: The S.I.C.L.E. Cell ::

my view from the prison of a SICLE (Self-Imposed Child Loss Experience) due to debilitating maternal disease
:: welcome to The S.I.C.L.E. Cell :: bloghome
SEARCH THE CELL Google Custom Search
| thesiclecell@yahoo.com ::
:: After abortion[>]
:: RealChoice[>]
:: Silent Rain Drops[>]
:: Stanek![>]

:: Friday, June 27, 2003 ::

Another excerpt (with permission):

"I had decided to go to [the abortion clinic] because they were the only ones that would accept my mother's credit card over the phone and that would take me the next day.

Once I arrived I was told to wait in the waiting room until someone called. 2 minutes later they did. The receptionist handed me a clipboard which had the following documents: a release form, consent form, a form which, in medical terms, explained what different procedures they offered. The release form had a space where I was to sign once I received "counseling." I took the unsigned form up to the receptionist to ask her about it. She advised me to just sign it and a counselor would speak to me later.

About five minutes later a voice came over the intercom instructing five other girls and I to come to the receptionists area. Once there, we were escorted to the back of the clinic where we each waited for a sonogram. From that point we were given a blood test to see if we tested Rh negative. After the blood test I was given a Valium and told to wait in the next room for my name to be called.

Shortly thereafter, a girl came back to the room and called my name and I told her I wasn't ready. She called the next girl and the next and the next until finally it was just me. When she came in again I told her that I still wasn't ready and she said that they were going to be leaving soon and closing so I needed to hurry. I said OK and asked if I could go to the restroom. She said fine. I went, came out, and found her and one other girl standing there in front of the door. They asked if I was ready again, and I said yes. They brought me to the operating room where I was instructed to remove my underwear and put my feet in the stirrups while they went to get the doctor. I removed my underwear, sat on the table, and placed my feet in the stirrups. About ten seconds later the two girls came back with a man who told me his name and asked me to lie back. I did. One girl came up beside me and took my hand and the doctor instructed me to bring myself closer to him. He then inserted his finger in me and placed a hand on my stomach to feel the position of my uterus. Next, he inserted a speculum.

At that point I told them that I didn't want to do this. He ignored me and continued to apply antiseptic while telling the girl holding my hand to give me the gas. She put the mask on my face, I felt a sharp pain in my vagina, and she leaned over and told me that he was numbing my cervix. I started crying hysterically and tried to tell them again to stop. The doctor leaned over me, put his face about four inches from mine and told me to stop crying because my snot was clogging up the mask and I wouldn't get any gas. I then threw off the mask and screamed at him that I didn't want to do this. I then heard a loud sound and again asked them to stop and tried to move. The girl then informed me that the pregnancy was interrupted. I felt it. I felt the suction, I heard the sound when it made contact with my baby's body. That was it.

From the moment they entered the room until he left carrying the metal pan that contained my child's torn body it took about five minutes.

I sat up, crying loudly telling them I wanted to leave and they said I couldn't. One of the girls then took my arm, told me to pick up my clothing and took me into another room where 4 girls where sitting on heating pads. She tried to get me to sit down, I didn't want to and told her again I wanted to leave. She told the woman in the room to prepare an early release. I tore off the gown and put on my clothes. The girl in the room told me to sit down and wait. I asked if I could get my boyfriend who was in the next room, and they said I couldn't. I asked to use the phone, and they said no. She then asked me to sit next to her and sign the papers that were before me, which I did. I then got up and went to where my boyfriend was waiting and we left."

So much for "choice".


:: ashli 4:15 PM # ::

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?